That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
