if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize