Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
