Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
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