I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
