Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
