I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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