I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
The feeling are messing with the penis
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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