Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
