I just cut my nipple shaving
either way he was missing a nipple.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
