We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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