We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
