my text book just quoted the cookie monster
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
