yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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