Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
