"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize
