I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
