I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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