New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
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