A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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