it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
this boner is exhausting
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
