great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
