no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
