Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
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