please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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