I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
