found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
