So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
