what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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