After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
