It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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