I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
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