I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Randomize
