Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
We had sex on a dog bed..
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
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