hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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