there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
