I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
