The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Randomize
