They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
