Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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