Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Randomize
