yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
