he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
