so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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