In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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