I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
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