I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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