PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
