i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
