i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Randomize
